Candy coated happiness

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Posted Thursday, October 25, 2007 - 12:00am

It can be seen all around us, the prospect of losing

weight and living that "South Beach" life we all

imagine. Th at's how we would like to see the world

around us, while what we ultimately see through

our gleaming eyes are the sights of grease- covered

cow slabs and chocolate-smothered Hoho's. Oh how

tantalizing. While it sounds retched, these inanimate

happiness providers have become an all too common

vice in our country.

As the billboards around us seem to star every

desire known to man, we fi nd ourselves engorged

in the materialistic, sugar-coated comforts we

fi nd around us. While we see these tantalizing

objects staring down at us, calling our

names, a slight turn of the head makes us

face another demon.

Plastered next to that photo of children

with candy-coated faces are the images

of the people Americans love to hate,

the girls with size 0 waists and the guys

with the perfectly steroidal-abdominal

muscles.

Although they are confl icting images,

they are both highly representative of American

stupidity. Why has the American public become so

overly concerned with looking fabulous and wearing

those skin tight jeans, while taking care of ourselves

is at the bottom of the list? Has shoving a fi nger

down our throat after that, oh so delicious slice of

pie become our way of life? It seems it has.

While we have McDonalds practically being

shoved down our throats, there are also the other

demons telling us that size two is the only way to fi nd

satisfaction. With our crazy views of life and what is

important, it is amazing that not every American can

be found in a padded room petting the walls.

Living the average American life, it becomes

humorously familiar. A simple "sit-down" in front

of the television can turn into a game of tug-of-war

of the mind. Th e sequence: she is the fi rst to show

herself, the 500 pound beast who turned into the

beauty in six short weeks. "Trim spa baby!"

As the number appears at the bottom of the

screen, enticing you to lose that fl ab around

your midsection, the image suddenly

changes and a hungry man is displayed,

sitting at home, and then there it is,

"I'm thinking Arby's," when you

really know what he is thinking

is "I'm thinking early death."

While you can see the grease

drip off the wax fi gurine of the

sandwich on the screen, you can't help your mouth

from watering in suspense for your next roast beef

melt. Th en there it is, the devil himself, screaming,

asking if you want more energy to get you through

your day? As the obnoxious man in the jumpsuit

screams, you grab the phone, eyeing the number at

the bottom of your screen. "I'm going to have more

energy," you're thinking as you dial quickly and

there it is, the zoom in of the Gazelle logo, and the

instant grab for you credit card. Two months pass,

and the Gazelle is in the corner, but the television

is still your true love.

It has become all too common that we engorge

in these grease-fi lled, inactive lifestyles, but it is

when the fabulously fi t and beautiful people show

themselves that our society has the true problem.

America has lost all sense in working for health,

and this is when the starvation/fi nger aerobics set

the pathway for the "nada-inch" waist we all desire.

While we want the bikini bodies and muscle shirt

torsos, we have no desire to naturally, and healthily

do it ourselves.

Going down this yellow brick road of hell, we

need to fi nally fi gure it out. In order to live the long

lives we seem to desire, a simple sit-up here and

there, and maybe an apple instead of that burrito

will give us the best of two worlds, a body that is

appropriate to show and happiness that isn't simply

a sugar rush.

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